Lockdown So Far

2020 the year that the world was tipped upside down and as cheesy as it might sound, life as we know it changed. You will already know this but as of Sunday 22nd March at 5pm Boris Johnson put the UK in lockdown. All because some clever arse in China decided to eat a bat which was carrying a killer virus call Coronavirus (or COVID-19). Well bloody done you utter arse wipe!

During these 7 weeks there has been nothing but bad news (for obvious reasons due to the killer virus that has a grip firmly on the world) but surely we all have some individual things that we are grateful for since lockdown? Since this little blog is like my diary and escape from the “real” world when my head starts to struggle, I’m going to go through my lows and highs.

The Lows

The main low is not being able to see my family and boyfriend, but everybody is in the exact same situation. However at the moment I’m still living at home so I’ve got to spend a hell of a lot more time with my mam which has been lovely and time that I’ll never forget.

I’ve also been poorly for the last 3 weeks with no bloody explanation as to why. It started off on the 23rd April when I started to get some pain behind my shoulder blades but I just ignored it because sometimes when I’m stressed at work this has happened before. The following day I was in the office and around 3pm I was going to cover reception when the shoulder pain came back but this time I also had a stabbing pain on the left had side of my torso. This went after around 5 minutes and did not come back until 8pm at night along with numbness in my left arm.

This pain got worse and started to keep me awake or wake me up on a night. I was told by Stockton hospital that it’s COVID because I had a spike in temperature ONCE to 40,3 (bearing in mind in was fully dressed in bed with a hot water bottle), I self isolated and managed to do a at home test which came back negative!

Since the pain started I’ve spoken to 111 3 times, Stockton hospital 2 times, my own doctors 3 times and all I get is friggen co-codamol tablets which I have said are not even touching the pain at all. Am I F*** going back to the doctors to be fobbed off again. There must be some way of managing the pain, I’ll eventually find that and get full feeling back in my left arm (it’s literally taken a week for me to do this because of the pain and constantly falling asleep). I’m more upset because it;s not like I’m constantly at the doctors and the last time that I did I ended up needing an emergency operation 3 days later.

I’ve also been struggling with my mental health, like a lot of people will be during this crazy time. I’ve just not been inspired to actually do anything, I’ve wanted to stop my subscription to glossybox, I’ve wanted to completely stop my blog. But then again in times like this when I actually manage to sit and blog or go through the process of taking photographs then it helps keep me sane (it might not be the best content ever but if it helps to keep my head straight then surely it’s a positive thing, right?).

The highs

So these are not going to mean a lot to many people but there has got to be some sort of highs throughout this lockdown, no matter how small they may seem.

Before being poorly I was managing to do little jobs around the house. You know them little piddly jobs that you put off for “another day” that never actually happens? Well thanks to lockdown them days actually came.

Like I said above, the amount of extra time I’ve had with my mam has been great. It’s not time that we would have normally had because of our work shifts we would normally be like passing ships so extra time with her has been lovely.

I’ve also got back into reading which no matter what way you look at it, it’s a good thing.

How are you coping with lockdown?

Love,

Kathleen xox

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